when boo was home from “school” (daycare) on tuesday, we went out to eat and then over to best buy for some stuff. as we are walking out of don pablos, we stop and pull up her pants and whatever. she says that her knee hurts. hubbin asks her why does your knee hurt? she says, problemchild#1, let’s call him “dallas” at school bit her. did someone bite you, we ask. yeah, she says cute as can be, “dallas did, on my….on my….on my knee”. we schuck off her pants and look, like it’s a perfectly normal thing to do in the don pablos vestibule, take off your childs pants and inspect their skin. we didn’t see anything. did you tell your teacher that dallas hurt you? i ask. “no” boo says, kind of sad.
then we had a little talk about always telling teacher or mommy or daddy when someone hurts you. hubbin and i exchange semi-concerned looks and that was that.
next morning as we are all cuddling in bed, boo is snuggled into me and i’m rubbing her back and her legs and she says that her knee hurts. “your knee hurts? why does your knee hurt?” i ask again. i mean, at this point i’m thinking if she says it was another kid, we know she’s become part of the little liars club, but you don’t want that, and i know she doesn’t have that in her, YET. “dallas bit me on my knee” she says and points to the scene of the crime on her leg. and again we have a talk about if someone hurts you, you tell an adult.
and it was with some trepidation that i called the school. i told them what was going on, talked to the assistant director and boo’s teacher. boo’s teacher, whom we love, said she was upset a couple of times yesterday and she did come to me, but she never said anything about dallas biting her. weird. well, i said, i don’t want to accuse anyone, but i really don’t think she has it in her yet to make up stories and lie. i mean, she just doesn’t know how to do that yet. they said they would keep and eye out - whatever that means, and that was that. and i kept thinking to myself, am i overreacting? no. i believe my child, you have to. and this guy, this dallas is a problem kid. every single time i have dropped her off or picked her up and he is there, he is up on the furniture, climbing on something. he’s just a very rough, physical kid. and i absolutely can see him biting other kids. he’s a bully in the making that one, and it’s not his fault. but still, i have to think of my daughter.
so all day, yesterday, all day i was playing with her and changing her pants and her clothes and i looked and didn’t see anything.
then hubbin comes home last night and takes her up stiars to change her. she comes back down alone with no pants on, and i’m thinking, okay she’s escaped without pants. but hubbin calls down - “look at her leg”. and fuck if there was a perfect little shit sized bite mark on her leg. i wanted to scream.
we took pictures and again she said dallas bit her.
this morning, i drop her off at school and i talk to the assistant director. i tell her about the mark and that i was glad she took the time to talk to me, etc. then i bring boo into her class and i tell her teacher, who was really amazed. i think she’s more embarassed that she missed it, and that boo didn’t say anything. i told both gals that we are working on telling adults when someone hurts us, but that they need to deal with dallas and the bite. and towards the end of my coversation with the AD, she says, you know i went in there yesterday and i did see dallas go after another kid, and it made me think, okay - maybe he did bite her. YA THINK?!
i have been looking at moving her to a different childcare center, a different company. and now i’m positive that i should move in that direction. i mean, i get it, kids are going to get into scraps at school, and she’s going to get bit and pink eye and whatever. but if there is a problem kid in the class, and the school is limited in their dealings with him as far as discipline goes, i have to have my daughter’s best interest at heart.
and the sad thing is, is that she had some good friends in her class that have moved into the next classroom. they were a little older than her, but those were the kids she hung out with and all of them were terrific. she’s five months from moving up to their class, but i really don’t think i should put up with bullshit for that long. and i’m pretty sure she’ll need to be potty-trained too. but dont get me started with that.
anyway, i have to trust my instincts. i knew deep down she wasn’t making it up, but there was no mark, and she said she didn’t tell her teacher. so i mean, what do you do? i’m glad i believed her, i’m glad i called the school, and i’m sorry that she has a bruise on her leg, but i’m glad it’s there and she was telling the truth. she’s a good kid, our boo, a really good kid. and it bums me out when bad things happen to good kids.