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Oscar Shmoscar

Post on March 7th, 2010 by Jodie

Okay, after seeing this, if Avatar wins best picture, I’m going to be pissed. Sure, technically it’s a stunning film, but the acting and story were on par with those ‘new’ Star Wars films. And after seeing this, I’m totally convinced that if James Cameron wins best director I’m going to punch him in the neck.

CFV 426 - Avatar/Pocahontas Mashup FINAL VERSION from Randy Szuch on Vimeo.

Category movies, dorkdom | No Comments »

The Perfect Gift

Post on March 2nd, 2010 by Jodie

Darlings, if you ever wondered what the perfect gift for me would be….stop wrecking your brains. This bitch is so easy to buy for, it’s scary. This should help. It’s only (yeah, ONLY) $200.

P.S. My birthday is in early June. Wink wink, nudge nudge.

Category just the day, movies, dorkdom, Things I find on Twitter | No Comments »

Little Pink Pill

Post on March 1st, 2010 by Jodie

I tweaked my shoulder, neck and back over the weekend. I don’t know how. And after self-medicating (my favorite hobby) with some Chardonnay, my dad gave me two little pink pills called darvocet. I think.

I cannot really take pain medication without getting horribly nauseated. So as much as I’d like to be a pill popper - the lining of my stomach does not allow it. However I did have one anti-nausea pill left in the back of the cabinet. So last night, when I couldn’t stand the pain anymore and after I had iced my back, shoulder and neck, I broke down and took the pills.

They both worked great, and after seeing the chiropractor this morning I’m on the mend. However I had a really vivid dream.

I was in Boston at an old theatre/playhouse. I was carrying around this beat-up paperback novel with me with a green and white cover and real flowery art. I think I had written the book. But I kept opening it and flipping pages trying to remember something or looking for a clue. Then it dawned on me, I was looking for Jason Bateman because I knew he liked old-timey typewriters and the theatre had an “historical display of Early American typewriters”. So I was hoping to run into him and tell him I’m sorry I left. That I still loved him and then I was overcome with weepiness and sorrow at the thought that he might not want me back.

THEN the play started. It was Macbeth - staring (get this) Jeremy Irons and Cher. I got so caught up in the unnaturalness of the thing that I stopped looking for Jason Bateman and became utterly engrossed in watching what turned out to be a really good show.

Category medication needed, dorkdom, dreams | No Comments »

Go Me!

Post on February 23rd, 2010 by Jodie

I just did twenty minutes on the treadmill and then took a shower. While drying and brushing my hair, I watched 24 on Hulu and now The Buns is awake and I have to go pick up The Boo from school.

I feel great.

I think it’s important to give as much time and energy to acknowledging our good days as well as our bad. Although our bad days always seem more interesting. Luckily there is little to gravity to our good days, which is why our bad days seem especially burdensome.

A few things on my mind today:

B-Sides - I got to see B-Sides last weekend and he gave me easily one of the top ten hugs of all time. And when I saw him he mentioned his old college band. The name was something that I knew and had heard of, but hearing it after so much time and thinking it was forgotten was just ultra-cool. Gust.

The Outlaw - Heard through the grapevine that The Outlaw’s Mom passed away over the weekend. She was always very sweet to me and while I’m not happy she’s gone, I’m happy that she’s no longer in pain.

White Apples - Jonathan Carroll recommended this book to me and for the life of me I can’t get through it. Not nearly as emotionally sweet or cosmically engaging as The Ghost In Love.

Lunch - I have two lunches planned this week and I’m looking forward to both for very different reasons.

Cheese Sticks - I have been craving and craving and craving these. They are so gross and bad for you, but so wickedly delicious.

I feel like I’ve over used adverbs in this post. For that I’m truly sorry.

Category just the day, dorkdom, lists, Jonathan Carroll | No Comments »

The Babysitter scene

Post on February 10th, 2010 by Jodie

I hate to gush about a TV show, because it makes me feel really insipid. Oh I love this show so much I have to BLOG about it, it feels pathetic in a stay-at-home-mom way that just makes me cringe. At least it’s not about Oprah.

I was watching Twin Peaks last night and I got to the episode (ep. 14 or 15) when Ben Horne is in jail for Laura Palmer’s murder and his brother Jerry comes to visit. There are bunk beds in Ben’s cell and Jerry says, Ben remember? Me on the top bunk, you on the bottom bunk and Louise Dembowski dancing on the hook rug with a flashlight? Then the scene changes and this Angelo Badalamenti 50’s-rock music starts playing and it’s about a minute of this girl in bobby socks dancing slow-mo with a flashlight and it’s one of those moments from childhood that is so wonderful and sweet it makes your heart swell. Ben and Jerry pause and look off in the distance sighing and smiling, thinking of an easier time. Then Jerry says, Lord, what’s become of us? And we’re back in the jail cell with two men who aren’t nearly as successful as they think they are.

It is one of my favorite scenes from the series and I had completely forgotten about it. It is the antitheses of the whole Twin Peaks series and David Lynch’s filmmaking philosophy. In jail for murder, flooded by this great memory. Aching for a simpler time, for a chance to go back and make things right. Having no choice but to move ahead toward your doomed fate. All of Lynch’s characters are doomed on Twin Peaks. All of them. Every single one. Even my beloved Agent Cooper.

I used to think that the whole world was like that. That no matter what we did, we were doomed, more specifically damned. But we aren’t. There is an abundance of love in my life and with the slightest effort I can open my mind and receive it. We all can. No matter how bad your day, there is a moment of love waiting for you. Be open. Be ready.

Category just the day, the love i have for you, the revolution will not be televised, dorkdom | No Comments »

There is no “I” in Team

Post on January 15th, 2010 by Jodie

Being a Gemini, it’s very easy for me to pick sides. Whether or not I stay on the chosen side is another story completely. But nine times out of ten I instantly know where I stand. Here is a list:

Team Edward
Team Eric
Team CoCo
Team Ramona
Team Sawyer
Team Klobuchar
Team Griffin
Team Gunn
Team Gervais
Team Girl
Team Goth
Team Simon
Team Target
Team Otter
Team Dyke
Team Dog
Team Minneapolis
Team Books
Team Hulu
Team Ginger
Team Beatles
Team Lance
Team Purple

Category dorkdom, lists | Comments Off

Nerd Girl - The Adam Rapp episode

Post on January 12th, 2010 by Jodie

I am rawly and richly embarrassed.

Here I’ve been thinking how great it is that a guy I went to college with has published a few books and then I google him and find out he’s a goddman New York City darling and some sort of writer wizard. Apparently, I live under a rock. That tall ginger who lived down the hall from one of my boyfriends is a phemon and I had no idea. Please, don’t mistake this as a wail of regret for not having followed so clearly a talented young man through the course of his career. No, this is just the dry-heaves sick feeling of me being silly enough to contact him through fucking Facebook and say Hi.

In my own defense I made it a point to cut off most of that college crowd. I am not proud of the girl I was then. I don’t want to be remembered for her. I made little to no effort in staying in touch with people. And clearly, here is one of the dangers of Facebook. Making tall, handsome, unattainable men from college accessible; you can poke them, you can say Hi, you can send them a cell phone through Mafia Wars. Was there ever a more obvious sign that I need to get a life?

I recently read The Year of Endless Sorrows by Adam Rapp and loved it. Having the same college in common I felt in on some of the jokes. The sheer noise of New York crowds any novel written about it, but having a shared place of origin like that, well, it felt like being leaned into and whispered at. The breath of a certain yellow jacket with block purple letters (mine’s from the Pom Squad) brushed that small space between my ear and cheek and I couldn’t help but blush and smile. Dorms named after nuns?! I wouldn’t believe it if I didn’t know for a fact that it was true.

When I went off to college I left Minneapolis for a small city in Iowa - not really a step up. I thought that getting out of my parents house would allow me to stretch myself and grow. But that experience of going somewhere to expand yourself and then practically being stifled by it had vexed me in ways I cannot fully express. It is that feeling of confinement that seems to shadow Mr. Rapp’s nameless narrator throughout the novel. I could relate to that, to so badly wanting to shed a formal self but realizing too late that it’s just not possible; we are who we are. We are all already ourselves. The two years I spent in college down in Iowa were terrible and wonderful. It was awful making such huge stupid mistakes. I loved easily and probably too much, I felt at times I was hurt beyond repair. And while broken and shattered I took enough away from the place to be a better person. Mr. Rapp’s narrator seems to deal with much of the same themes during his first year in New York. While parts of the novel are wickedly funny, parts are so heart-breaking I wanted to reach through the pages and give the young man a hug and a home-cooked meal.

So while this isn’t necessarily a review, it is in fact a strong and high recommendation. Heh, just how I like my men, strong and high. Sorry, couldn’t help it.

Again, I feel late to the party here. Mr. Rapp has written a ton of books and I’m only now discovering his talent. Maybe Nerd Girl needs a side-kick, like Lame Chick.

Category books, dorkdom, Adam Rapp, The Year of Endless Sorrows, Nerd Girl | No Comments »

Reason to smile

Post on January 5th, 2010 by Jodie

Two things have happened in the last twenty-four hours that have made me smile - real, big, genuine smiles.

One - My four year old daughter successfully Hot Boxed me (aka Dutch Oven) last night and it was hilarious. We were hiding from Daddy and I told her no giggling. So we snuggled under a blanket and then she lets one rip. It was epic too. I don’t know what that girl eats at school but man….phew! So I’m laughing and gasping for air and she’s telling me “Mommy, get down! Daddy will see you.” I’m shaking out the blanket and then she starts giggling and well, maybe you had to be there.

Two - I opened my door this morning to find a package from Harper Collins Press. Even though my short-lived communication with the Crybaby Publicist went south, she did put me in touch with Kevin Sampsell. And today I got his new book A Common Pornography: A Memoir. Which just goes to show that even though the Crybaby Publicist was horribly unprofessional to me, something good came out of it.

Category books, momdom, dorkdom | No Comments »

Funny

Post on December 8th, 2009 by Jodie

My top five funnies from Phoenix:

5. The Rooster - Apparently, the rooster that lives behind Uncle Arizona’s compound has no sense of time. That thing would crow from 3AM until 8:30 AM. So much for getting away from the kids and catching up on sleep.

4. Four Card Flush - One of my favorite things in AZ is playing poker with the gang. There is just something about sitting around, drinking, smoking and playing cards that makes me relax. Usually, the games go on for some time and by the end everyone is hammered and making really silly mistakes. A perfect example of this is Shaneco thinking he’d won a big pot from me with a four card flush. My pair of fives won.

3. Dumb Denver - I had an extra long lay-over in Denver on my way home, so I bought a Denver newspaper. There was an ad in there for “Newcomer Funeral Home”.

2. The Vikings - Why? Because that game was a goddamn joke.

1. 30,000 feet with Adam Rapp - Currently, I am about halfway through Adam Rapp’s The Year of Endless Sorrows. I don’t know what proper plane etiquette dictates here. I know I am a loud laugher. So on the plane I was really aware that I could NOT laugh like my normal self. When I got to the part about the couch-bound roommate and the fan I knew I was in a real pickle. The end result was me pressing my lips to the back of my hand and laughing hysterically with my shoulders. When I finally came up for air, flushed and with tears rolling down my cheeks, the person sitting next to me wondered if I was okay. Oh yeah, I said, I’m just reading this funny book called ‘The Year of Endless Sorrows’. Thankfully, I’m used to the strange looks people give.

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Go Me!

The Babysitter scene

There is no “I” in Team

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