the gunk
i’ve offically had the gunk now for over 10 days. my nose is plugged, my throat hurts, i developed a cough last night, and now i’m having weird ear drainage, popping and other stuff. last night i was surprisingly overcome with nausea. like i was curled around a bucket for a while. dry heaving doesn’t help a sore throat either.
i’m not sure what is worse actually throwing up or the lingering feeling like you are going to throw up. once you hurl, you generally feel better. but what if you don’t hurl and that icky, burpy, mouth full of saliva feeling sticks around, comes in waves and then doesn’t go away? that was last night for me. and i still haven’t completely found my sea-legs today either.
i just want to cuddle boo while we both sleep. there are times when i’m so miserable at night that i go into her room, gently pick her up and roll her onto my shoulder, and rock in the big chair. there is a stillness and comfort to her sleeping on me. not that she needs it, which usually isn’t the case. there are some kids who can ONLY fall asleep on their moms and then she’s like - hurry up and fall asleep - jon stewart comes on in five minutes. i need boo way more than she needs me. i need the weight of her little kid bones on my body to calm it, to ease my mind. she untangles me effortlessly.
yeah, it’s a little creepy that i sneak into my daughter’s room for a stealth cuddle. but it could be worse.